WillWybrow.com

…but Relentless prices up?

It’s a bit of an economical mixed bag. I was enjoying it when a can of Relentless was cheaper than a litre of petrol. Fuck petrol! Though the fact that it’s getting cheaper is probably a good thing. It’s less than 94p per litre at my local supermarket, but they put Relentless Inferno up about 10p just a few days ago! Nightmare!

But I went to 24 hour Tesco on campus yesterday night and bought some where it was still under £1. It’s good.

I don’t think I am being affected very much by the, ah, “credit crunch.” Things still seem to be costing the same as they always have. And, as usual, it’s easy to spend too much. Especially with my housemates; they don’t really realise that students aren’t meant to live in comfort and luxury. They’re supposed to buy all the cheapest things possible and barely live on them. It’s a nightmare when other people come back from shopping and ask for my money. They didn’t ask what I wanted to put my money towards…

Oh well, got a little bit of cash coming soon enough (in time for the holiday season, in fact), and maybe a little pocket of cash as gifts from Santa. Money is a bitch, but it’s the only path to true happiness.

If Sugar Puffs are toasted puffs of wheat, and Rice Krispies are toasted puffs of rice, why is there not a breakfast cereal of toasted puffs of corn, basically: popcorn? It might seem weird, but think about it for a second. You know that Butterkist popcorn stuff that’s laden with toffee; that would make a good breakfast cereal, right? Maybe it would. Someone should try it and get back to me.

Two times in the last few days, I’ve had the same, word-for-word qualifier for a feeling about a situation, that there is, in fact, “nothing quite like” it. Here they are:

There’s nothing quite like almost getting drunk

You have to admit that there is a certain uncharacteristic approach to drinking. It’s definitely mild masochism: there’s a chance you’ll act stupidly while under the influence, and these can have direct (say, you stumble drunkenly into the stove while it’s lit) consequences, or indirect ones (you write an embarassing text message and accidentally send it to your mother). You’ll also wake up the following morning feeling awful. So, when the aim of the night is this end result, you have to wonder how bad a failure is it if you don’t quite manage to get completely drunk? You save yourself a lot of potential bother and pain, and it’s a quiet success that feels like a quiet failure. There’s nothing quite like it.

There’s nothing quite like backup squash

Drinking water on its own is one of life’s little jokes on me, I think. I really could think of so many things I’d rather have in my mouth than the one thing I need to hydrate me and keep me alive. Water by itself is a long way down in the list of preferred things to drink, so I usually maintain a healthy supply of squash to improve the water. I pretty much depend on it to get enough water into my body, so when I ran out of it today, I was stuck with nothing but water to drink.

A while ago, I picked up a litre bottle from under my bed. My girlfriend had left it there when she came to visit, and it had a drinking cap on it, so I thought I’d keep it by in case I needed it. When the time came to using it, however, I forgot about it before departing on my journey, and when I returned, it was sitting on my desk with undiluted Robinson’s Summer Fruits squash in the bottom of it. Being the hoarder that I am (I loathe throwing things away, from old wireless network card aerials (a few of you should get that) to receipts from impromptu shopping trips), I just set the bottle aside.

Over the coming weeks, I accumulated some more things that piled up in front of the bottle, obscuring it from view. This meant that, this evening, as I was staring down a depressingly colourless pint glass of water, I accidentally moved into a position where I could see it. What did I see? I saw salvation in the form of backup squash.

I quickly hurled the glass of water away and ran a nice, cool new glass. I took down the drinking bottle reverently and slowly dripped squash into the waiting pint glass. Soon it took on a pinkish hue, and I knew it was ready. Snapping the remaining third fraction into airtightness once more, I replaced the bottle in its holding spot atop my highest shelf - place amongst heroes. The first sup from that holy, radiant glass was a thing of miracles. There really is nothing quite like it.

There’s a Facebook group specifically for my year in secondary school that I’ve only just started perusing. It only took a third of the photos to make me stop for a while and turn my face away wearing a wasted (because nobody was there to experience it) “every single one of you was a fucking cunt back then” expression. Bitter? Who, me? No, of course not, but just because I don’t want to hunt every one of them down and feed them feet-first under a steamroller doesn’t mean I won’t let everyone know the truth, that I was almost the only decent person there.

Some people have changed since then, and others I wouldn’t know about, but I’d go as far as to say there has been a <+1% swing in the quality of people from that shitty place. The year below is even worse… honestly, people are getting worse every single year.

Who knows why everyone is such a cunt? I certainly don’t, but it’s probably to do with religion… Maybe I’m just laying blame on a recurring culprit as a form of scapegoatery because I can’t think of anything justifiable to call them on…

Fanboytopia

Last night in bed, I was thinking to myself. There are a few things that I really enjoy, or things that I think have unparalleled greatness. I wanted to share with you guys just a few things that I’m a “fanboy” of, without any justification. I’m thinking it’ll offset some of the negativity that’s rife through this festering pit of criticisms.

I had weighed up the advantages and disadvantages of listing some small justification or explanation of why I think these things are so great, but I decided against it, as it will encourage people to pick holes in my reasoning. But I’m really fine with what I think, even if it is irrational (because in my mind, taste in certain things is irrational and, obviously, completely circumstantial and subjective (and so, unarguable)).

So, if you had to pick ten of the most awesome things in your life (and they can be anything - people, concepts, bands, foods or anything) that you are a die-hard fan of (and this is measured relative to your own obsessions of things, not other people’s. That is to say that even if you don’t own clothing plastered with a band’s image and cover your room in posters of the band, you can consider yourself a fanboy if you’re more devoted to them than you are to other bands… if that makes sense?), what would those ten things be?

• Opera Internet Browser
• Legacy of Kain series
• Relentless Energy Drink
• Firefly/Serenity series
• Sainsbury’s Supermarket
• Warwick Atheists
• Azureus Bittorrent Client
• Jasc Paint Shop Pro
• Sonic the Hedgehog (especially pre-2003)
• WordPress

And, just so you all know, it was a deliberate move not to put my lady-friend in the list. That implies nothing, I’d still trade these things all away for her in a heartbeat. Remember that.

I only own clothing adorned with the image of three of those things (it oughtn’t be too hard to guess which ones), but I’m working on it. Also, the number ten was arbitrary, here are some of the runners-up:

• Southern Comfort
• Subway
• Rise Against
• Blink-182
• Clickteam
• Facebook
• The Herbs and Spices aisle in supermarkets
• xkcd
• Lindt Lindor truffles
• Tesco Whole Orange Squash (no added sugar)
• Mountain Dew
• Smoked Salmon
• Pirates of the Caribbean
• Christian Bale
• JD Wetherspoon
• Nintendo DS

Having looked over the list, there’s quite a lot of computery/internet stuff there, as well as quite a lot of food… I guess it shows the main interests in my life…

I’m not saything that some people are cowards, but they do really need to grow some backbone once in a while and realise the full force of the blunt edge of the word “no”.

What’s more important than this, however, is the way that some people really need to align their affairs: ’sort their life out’, if you will, before deciding to indulge in that ridiculous yet common pastime of binge drinking. Honestly, some people can’t act respectably for two seconds of an evening once the alcohol starts to flow. Contrary to some schools of thought, alcohol really doesn’t improve social skill at all. But easy or desperate people become even easier or even more desperate when the units start totalling up, and then they meet and catastrophe ensues. Fantastic!

You ruin the time for a lot of other people by acting inappropriately, and I’m tired of just letting it slide because you’re friends. Real friends don’t let other friends do stupid things, so here is your wake-up call.

Maybe a lot of you should give up drinking…

Due to popular demand, I’m putting up a second page about eating. This should satisfy some of you whining, bitchy little girls.

Worcester Sauce

What is there to say, except this stuff tastes really fantastic when applied to any meal or cooking process. It brings all that is good about Worcester (which is actually only the fact that this sauce shares the name) to the dining table or kitchen.

Thai Sweet Chilli Sauce

I argued this one when it was suggested, but that was actually just to avoid admitting the obvious: I’d forgotten it. Deliberately, of course - I was waiting for the second installment, weren’t you? Anyway, the Thais, as a race, may be as indistinguishable from their oriental neighbours as one grain of rice from the next, but their use of sweet chillis is pretty renowned and tasty. Perfect accompaniment for anything.

Honey

Another sweet one for all of you dessert-loving women. Honey is a soft, sweet substance which is made by little bumble bees for the sole purpose of making our sweets taste better. And honey is as versatile as sugar itself - it goes with dairy-sweet (like yoghurt - a must for Greek style anyway), and both types of fruit-sweet (even citrus… heard of honey and lemon cough medicine, you philistines?). So this one goes in too.

That’s all for you this time, folks. But stay tuned!

TC